What can I say about our beloved Guruji's Blessing? The word that is coming to my mind is "Bountiful". Yes, that is the right word to use if I want to express Guruji's blessing. Once you have Guruji's grace and begin to feel it, the first feeling that you get is, simply wonderful. You feel that all your problems have been resolved and that it is "ok". You know it for a fact that you have someone who will look after you and handle all the problems.
This was exactly my experience. I will never forget the first time I set eye on my beloved Guruji! Oh! My! The loving look on Guruji's face and his kind gestures! Oh! Guruji! How could you make me wait so long before showing yourself to me? All my troubles and pain suddenly vanished. It was simply amazing. I felt that I had to go through all the pain and ache in order to be able to unite with Guruji at that first meet. It also crossed my mind that if not for all that pain, I may not have appreciated Guruji as I did then and now! Oh! Guruji! How could you make me wait? Will I have to wait this long in my next birth?
Yes, this is a question that is running in my mind now that I have met Guruji. Every time I think of Guruji, all I can feel is his blessings and warm smile. I sincerely believe that every thing that has happened in my life was a purposeful design by GOD to meet Guruji. You will be put in such a spot that when you meet Guruji, you will just know that "this is it" and that you are in "the right place". As I started my sadhana meditating on "Om Jai Gurudeva", in the beginning, I felt that I had a series of difficult time along with heartaches. I constantly reminded myself to surrender it all to Guruji and that if it was my karma to face such music, then so be it. Atleast I am dealing with my karma right now and know for a fact that Guruji will handle my future. I simply have this unshakable faith that my future will be fine. Guruji will guide me to my destiny.
As time went on and as I continued with my prayers to Guruji and trying to constantly sing bhajans during my free time, I remembered my love to sing and my love for music which has been 'untouched' since I stated work as a lawyer and as life progressed into marriage and children.
Yes, once we are 'touched' by our beloved Guruji grace, Guruji will rekindle all the 'untouched' penchants and talents that we have. This is the beginning of realising our Guruji. Yes, as time went by, my troubles and worries started to subside. Even when my troubles start, I always believe that it is a gentle reminder to constantly do sadhana and remember Guruji at all times. That is how the law of life reminds us to constantly remember and touch God. Oh! My beloved Guruji, why did you have to make me wait so long for such realisation?
One evening as I sat to meditate in my home during Guruji's second visit to Malaysia, I simply bust into a particular tune and a whole complete song came to me. It was then that i realised that I too could compose music and that the words just fall in place. It was all the love for Guruji and the peace of mind that Guruji gives us that allows such music to blossom.
Over the months, my troubles with Guruji's grace have vanished. Even if I do face any trouble, I take it in my stride and do my best not to react as it is part of my karma that I have to face. But sadhana has to continue. I try to be more vigorous in my meditation but stilling the mind is still not that easy.
One of the best moments for me that I cherish is my evening walks. I still remember the first time I went for a walk after meeting beloved Guruji. I would sing bhajans and just imagine Guruji all throughout my walk. I would be so at peace and thank Guruji for Guruji's shower of grace. I did not know at that point in time what Guruji's grace was or meant but I just had firm believe that it would make everything go away, make everything better and simply wonderful.
Now as I continue to walk in the path set for me, I understand Guruji's grace better and enjoy all the moments of happiness and sudden luck that is all showered upon me by Guruji's grace. Yes, our beloved Guruji's grace touches all parts of our lives and leads us to certain cross roads. The grace even opens up avenues for our hearts desire. Yes, that is the key word I have come to believe. "Hearts desire" is the closest we can get to our soul. That is why Guruji's grace allows us to discover our innate talents as it is a vasana of the soul. When we express our talents, we are expressing our souls desire and merge with our soul.
Yes, the little Amma's temple that my family feverishly frequent every friday now has opened up an opportunity for me to sing bhajans there. Yes, it is such a wonderful feeling and union of many people from different sects singing and trying to make some music in our little Amma's temple. All for the love of Amma! Yes, this is just the beginning. May I be able to discover and re-discover my soul more and more with Guruji's guidance and blessing.
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